Marketing is Like Dating

In recent weeks I’ve had a difficult time explaining to my engineering buddies how I could be into internet marketing now.  They tend to equate marketing with sales, and therefore think of it as a dishonest trade.  The other day I finally thought of an analogy that helped them see things from my (newly discovered) perspective.  I thought I’d do a blog post on it.

Marketing is Like Dating

Marketing is like dating because you can be the nicest guy in the world but if you are an introvert, your crush may never know you exist.

Lets dive deeper, shall we?

Women dig confidence.  Confidence alone is why the jock, the charming guy, and the random not-so-attractive dude got the popular girl in high school.

The jock was confident and fun.

The popular guy was charming and reassuring.

And the random guy simply had social proof in his corner.

So what sells?  Honest confidence in yourself and product.  A product that is fun and risk free.  Oh, and by the way others are using it too!

You see, these are critical parts of the sales process – all of which get people to trust and like you.

The problem is that most introverts are hard-wired to not think this way.  Engineers, for example, think in terms of quantifiable metrics, not the invisible stuff that builds relationships.

But you cannot quantify building relationships and trust.  They are too infinite and abstract.

You must build trust before you can ever ask for a sale.  That is why blogs are so powerful.

They allow you to build an audience and trust.  Regular readers like your stuff and trust you and eventually some of them might buy something from you.

But it is not about the money just like it is not about the sex.  It can’t be.  Even though you both want it, if you are too direct with either you will lose the date or in this case the sale.

And it is not that the jock, popular guy, or random guy are being dishonest.  In fact, they are being themselves.  The random guy could never act like the jock and vice versa.

They do however go at dating game with their own angle.  Do this in your marketing.

If your crush likes funny guys.  Show her your funny side.  If you are not that funny and that is what she is into, move on.  She is not the right customer for you.

If she likes security, stand up straight and beat on your chest – or not.

Accounting was boring.  Freshbooks made it less boring.

“Being yourself” is not the same as “being confident,” so it is important not to integrate the two.  Everybody has a weakness just as every product has a weakness.  Forget about it and instead focus on your strengths.

Find what your good at – your angle in marketing or in dating and you will find your customer or your soul mate.

Most importantly, be confident in whatever you are doing.



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Eliot is a software developer by trade and a entrepreneur by spirit. He has built web software for the likes of YMCA, UPS, FedEx, Ford and Harcourt, and helped launch mobile apps like Coupon Policy, TourWrist, and Pocket Legal.

Join him as he learns and shares his experiences of marketing his own products online.

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